Things my husband will not let my buy on Etsy

Our house is slowly coming together: 

but the only problem is that we still have a lot of white space on the walls, so we are constantly searching for stuff to put up there.

And by we, I mean me, since Mr. B has the gift for visual design that all men have inherited:

 

The only problem is, as you have probably surmised by now, gentle reader, I am weird, and I like weird things, and Mr. B wants to keep it normal.

So he vetoes everything I want on Etsy.  Things he has vetoed in the recent past or will veto as soon as he sees them include:

Photo of unhappy Belorussian couple getting married.

Large Kraken Wall Decal-which is -ON SALE-, people.

 

“We’re not Scottish. Stop it.”

Too abstract. There should be a picture of Inigo and Wesley dueling.”

 “Absolutely not.”

“You have serious issues you should probably address with the help of a medical professional.”

 “You’ll give people the wrong impression. This house is strictly cognac-oriented.”

“Stop showing me stuff.  I’m going upstairs.”

Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore.  I was being stylistically repressed, and I was not happy to express myself in my own house, visitors and Mr. B be damned.

After one too many mimosas during a Saturday brunch, I made an impulse buy.

And now Count Orloff will be mine in a mere two weeks.  

 Men just don’t understand.